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It is also possible for both of these outcomes to be present at the same time.

Whether someone flowers or stagnates emotionally post-divorce will depend on many factors, including the resiliency of their personality and mindset, the health of their support systems, and on whether they are successfully able to resolve ties that bind them in unhealthy ways to the now-defunct marriage.

Many experts believe this is because a majority of divorcees leap into hasty ill-conceived second marriages out of loneliness rather than carefully planning them for success.

It is wise to do one's homework before getting involved again to maximize one's chances of success.

Become conscious of past mistakes by laying them out and reviewing them.

Either alone (via journaling), or with the assistance of a trusted friend, family member or therapist, talk or write out the history of the marriage, from beginning to end.

Let Go, Forgive, Embrace Change Having learned from past experience, the next challenge divorced people face is that of placing their divorce in the past and deciding to move forward with life. Divorce is the end of one important chapter, and potentially the beginning of another.The process is inherently proactive, rather than reactive; it involves becoming willing to actively explore options rather than to passively react.While it isn't necessarily a good idea to attempt to force one's self to move on (at least in the first year), there are ways to cultivate its occurrence.I think we are mostly looking to me found and appreciated by another person, while having the opportunity to appreciate them back. And now, standing strong and alone again, we are ready to dip our toes into the idea of being loved and loving again. And here is what I’ve found to be the indicators of a healthy start.We want to become the most fantastic cheerleader for their hopes and dreams and we expect that positive affirmation in return. If your potential partner is still dramatically engaged or enraged at their ex partner, watch out. And it’s tough to get through all the processing that needs to happen before we can cut it loose and be free of the burden of our ex.

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